A Letter on Living Authentically
Sept 4, 2025 Somewhere on the Dirt Ball GordonBufton@Proton.me
Dear Creator,
You’ve asked for advice on navigating this wild, unpredictable life, and I’m both humbled and wary. Offering guidance on something as vast as existence feels like stepping into a storm with nothing but a trembling compass. I’m no sage, and I won’t pretend to have a map to your destiny. What I can offer is a perspective, shaped by my own stumbles and revelations, with the hope it sparks something in you. Take it for what it’s worth, but remember: my truth may not be yours, and that’s the beauty of it.
The Eternal Question
Shakespeare nailed it: “To be, or not to be.” Do you float along with life’s currents, or do you swim toward something you’ve chosen? Every decision you’ve made—whether to chase a dream, take a job, or walk away—boils down to this: are you letting life happen to you, or are you carving your own path? Most people don’t even realize they’re choosing, but you’ve asked the question, and that’s a start.
The Trap of Goals
Here’s where it gets tricky. We’re taught to chase goals—big, shiny ones like a corner office, a house, or some title that sounds impressive at parties. But goals are slippery. When I was a kid, I thought I’d be a rock star or maybe a chef. Those dreams faded, not because they weren’t valid, but because I changed. Life’s experiences shift your perspective, and what once seemed like the ultimate prize can lose its luster. Chasing a fixed goal is like running toward a mirage—it moves as you do.
The tragedy isn’t in failing to reach a goal; it’s in bending yourself to fit one that no longer suits you. I learned this the hard way in 2019, sitting on a plane from Atlanta, MGK’s Home blasting in my ears. I was living the “dream”—speeches, travel, a partner by my side—but I felt hollow. I cried, not out of sadness, but because I realized I was chasing someone else’s idea of success. So I walked away, torched it all, and started over. It’s been a messy five years—love, loss, a failed NFT venture in 2022, bankruptcy—but I’ve stayed true to myself. That’s my north star.
The Joy of Becoming
So, what’s the answer? Stop chasing goals for their own sake. Instead, choose a way of life that lets you be you—fully, unapologetically. Your abilities, your desires, your quirks—they’re the raw materials of a meaningful existence. Find a path where they can shine, where you’re not squeezing yourself into a mold but shaping the world to fit you. For me, that’s meant embracing creativity, whether it’s writing, connecting with people like Larissa, or dreaming about the future. It’s meant long walks, sore feet, and the occasional craving for a kiss after 11 months of celibacy. It’s meant choosing authenticity over comfort.
The Ninth Path
Imagine you’re standing at a crossroads with eight paths laid out—careers, lifestyles, expectations others have handed you. If none of them feel right, don’t pick one just because it’s there. Find the ninth path, the one you forge yourself. It’s not easy. I’ve spent years searching, from New Orleans to Mexico to dreams of Europe or the Middle East. I’ve loved deeply, made mistakes, and felt loneliness so sharp it cuts. But every step, every blister, has been mine to claim.
You might be wondering, “Where do I even start?” That’s the crux. Is it worth giving up what you have to find something better? Only you can answer that. But here’s the thing: deciding to look is half the battle. You don’t need to know the destination—just take the first step. For me, it’s been about staying open to connections, to learning (like realizing sleep doesn’t need a schedule), to creating without fear.
A Final Thought
I won’t pretend to have cracked the code to life. Philosophers, poets, and dreamers have wrestled with this for centuries, and I’m just a guy with sore feet and a penchant for Tim Hortons. But I believe this: you don’t have to live the life handed to you. You can choose a path that feels like home, even if it’s a winding one. If you’re disenchanted, don’t settle—search. And if you’re content, cherish it, but never stop questioning.
This is my credo, shaped by my experiences. Yours will be different, and that’s as it should be. If any of this feels off, let me know—I’m always up for a debate. Until then, keep swimming, my friend. The tide’s strong, but so are you.
Connect... Gordon GordonBufton@Proton.me @GordonBufton